Thursday, March 1, 2007

Bonds sent death threats

Barry Bonds is receiving death threats. While that is nothing really new in the world of reviled professional cheaters, where these letters are coming from is a bit of a unique story. After careful mail tracing and surveillance work at mail boxes across the Bay Area, the letters appear to be coming from a combination of Mark Sweeney, Bonds's family, and Barry's own organs. Sweeney is without a doubt disgruntled over the steroid allegations that Barry tossed onto him in the offseason. Bonds's family is most likely angered over a lifetime of Barry's demands around the house, including, insisting that a large leather recliner be his chair at the dining room table. What is surprising is that Bonds's own organs would turn on him. A spokesman for his liver refused comment but these letters are believed to have something to do with Bonds's history of steroid abuse inflicting damage upon his body.

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