But I don't wanna play for Duke anymore!

Noted softie post player Josh McRoberts is forgoing his last two years of eligibility at Duke to declare for the WNBA draft. McRoberts has tired of the constant criticism at Duke for his lack of toughness in the post and the way he wilts defensively when larger, bigger boys start bumping into him (they even use their elbows sometimes, that's not allowed). Coach K, like any good Kindergarten teacher, grew tired of the crying and reluctance to take the next steps in life development and agreed it was time for him to move on to the WNBA. There he can be happy knowing that no one will make fun of his My Little Pony panties and he won't have to have the biggest set of balls on the team just because he plays the post. I hate Duke, but I will miss seeing McRoberts embarrass the title of McDonald's All American.