Friday, March 2, 2007

Greg Maddux, The Silent Scumbag

Who knew that Greg Maddux was still such a juvenile frat boy at heart? I always thought he was just a technician all the time, but then again he has come up with some pretty good locker room gags that I'm sure he has perfected from a technical standpoint. Imagine you're just a rookie in the shower. Someone quietly approaches you from behind. Thoughts of prison rape float through your head. Oh wait, it's Greg Maddux. He tells you to keep your head up and not to let the negatives drag you down too much. Then you realize that he has just peed on your leg. You towel off and start to get dressed. You laugh off the urine thing as rookie hazing. Then you realize that Maddux has come up with a nickname about your third nipple (which you are sensitive about) that they whole team is already calling you. In the back of your head you pray you get to spend the season in Double A.

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