Monday, January 30, 2012
Facebook IPO gives whiners a voice
CNBC - Reports on Friday suggested that Facebook is preparing to announce an initial public offering Wednesday. The listing is the most anticipated of the decade and could value the company at $100 billion. The firm was founded just seven years ago by Harvard undergraduate Mark Zuckerberg
I know tons of people will make tons of money from a Facebook IPO but it really could be the worst thing ever. One of the problems with being a publicly traded company is that the share price can fluctuate greatly based on current events and PR backlash from company product changes resulting in drastic maneuvers to combat small temporary share price drops. Or every whiny pussy on Facebook who cries like a little bitch Cartman every time they make a little change and threatens to quit Facebook will now actually be taken seriously because the share price will drop from day traders and funds looking to make a quick buck on a short dip. So all those douchebags that start a group like "One Million Strong Against Timeline" or "Get rid of the 'like' button or I am giving up Facebook" will actually be paid attention to by important decision makers in the company. And as whining is rewarded with attention, more whiners will venture forth to whine and cry for their relevance. On the plus side, maybe Zucks will be freed up enough to go get a real billionaire's girlfriend. I don't care how rare an Asian plus sized model is, what's the point of having a girlfriend and a moneybin full of gold if you're popping viagara in your 20s to get it up for the fattie.